Unreal, Totally

Homestudy in hand.
Immigration paperwork ready to mail tomorrow.
Taxes E-filed.
Children all asleep.


It's 10:17 on a Friday night, and I feel like we just lived through the longest week.
We were so blessed to be introduced to the birthmom of one of our adopted children. It was surreal - seeing our child's eyes in the eyes of this almost stranger. Seeing her smile on the face of another.

Our daughters birthmom has lived a long, hard life in her 26 years. She is the same age as our second daughter, and I couldn't help but notice the similarities of the two. How would I feel if I were sitting at the table with my daughter, knowing what I know of this young woman? We were both moved by compassion at her plight, and without doubt, believing she loved her children and wants the best for them even though they are not a part of her life today.

I liked her. I was prepared NOT to. But there was a deep warmth in her eyes and kindness in her comments. I want to hold on to those feelings that were stirred inside of me when I met her. I can tell my young daughter, some day, that she was wanted, loved, cherished, but not able to be cared for like a child needs from a mother. We stepped in. But her birthmom really will never step out of her life. She is a carbon copy of her mother, in all the good ways that she will need to make it through life. I hope we can help our daughter make healthy, appropriate choices in her future, but take the determination that was born into her through genetics and make a strong mark in this world.

It was unreal. I was so unprepared for the experience, but so very grateful for it today.

As the children sleep, and we enter into a busy weekend of activity with basketball games, I am reminded of how great our God is that puts us in the right place, at the right time, to do the right thing...

And some days, it just feels unreal. Totally.