I sit here contemplating growing old. Some days my body screams, “STOP!!” and I am finally learning to do just that. It is hard to stop. After just coming off the holidays, and still having our grandsons here, I just don’t want to miss a thing. But last night, my legs were screaming at me to get some much needed rest, so I turned the lights off, and fitfully drifted into the comfort of my warm waterbed. I dreamed of the days ahead, trying to figure out just what is around the bend for us.
In just a short time we are loading the little ones in the van, and heading to Chicago to drop our daughter Jenni and her husband Jeremy off at the airport. As much fun as it always is to welcome the kids home, today is the painful part. I have never liked having the kids so far away from home (and Oregon is VERY far from Michigan) and saying goodbye after a visit is horrible. I am always grateful for our time together, but it never seems to be enough. I miss the day to day happenings in their lives, and the fact that they get over colds and the flu before I even know they had them. I know they are responsible adults now, but inside my heart is still the desire to snuggle them up and keep them close. To make sure they take their vitamins, dress warm and stay away from all the bad things the world wants to envelope them in. The consolation is that the grandsons are still here for a couple more weeks, so I won’t have to see them all leave at one time. Our oldest daughter, Ashleigh, is planning a wedding in August. We know that Jenni and Scott will do their best to return then to be with us for the wedding, but August seems a long time away.
I know as the holidays come to a close (or a screeching halt even!!) there is much to be thankful for. We are a family blessed beyond measure. We all appreciate relatively good health, and we have had wonderful times together that pile up to be warm memories to sustain us through the rest of this cold winter. Mike and I are considering what our role is to be in the broad scheme of the international adoption world, and we are excited (if not with some trepidation) about what this new year has in store for us all.
So as I sit here thinking of saying goodbye to my second daughter, thinking of aches and pains and growing old, and watching the little ones pack a small sack of toys to keep them busy on the way to the airport, I can say life is still good. And I know that the ONE who sustains me through the rest of my days loves me and my brood more than I can ever understand. And there is no greater comfort and rest than that.
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