It is getting closer. I can tell by the negative comments I get from those around me.
I guess in a perfect world, everyone would be excited to see an orphan connect to a family. Some one to care for them, love them, feed them, give them medical care and an education.
In a perfect world, those who can care for an orphan would, and those who could not, would simply be supportive of the ones who can.
In a perfect world, it wouldn't take many, many months of seemingly endless paperwork to bring an orphan home.
In a perfect world, there would be no orphans.
Our dossier has been to Lansing for state authentication. It was returned and is ready to go to our agency in Portland, OR. to be sent to Ethiopia. 4 pieces of paper had to be returned for the state seal, so that left yesterday. Within 2 weeks it should be returned. Then the complete dossier is ready to travel across the world to begin the referral process that will match us with our Ethiopian children.
We are so excited to be at this step in the process, but we can't help but be saddened by some of the responses around us.
"Oh, more kids? Don't you have enough already?"
"Why would you bring foreign kids here? We have homeless children in the states."
"Don't you know how old you are?"
"You can't save the world, you know."
"I have 2 kids you can raise."
"What if these kids make your own kids sick?"
"You have 7 kids with problems. That will just make them worse."
I can not explain why God put this desire in our hearts. Sometimes I don't understand it myself. And yes, life for us can be hard some days, but what we go through will never be the hardship that the Ethiopians endure day after day.
I don't want to be stuck in the thinking that because I was blessed to be born in America that I can gloat in my achievements while others suffer.
I never go hungry. I never thirst for fresh water. I sleep comfortably at night, and do not have fears of what tomorrow will bring.
I may not have everything and I know we can not save every orphan.
But God put Ethiopia on our hearts, and helped us prepair a plan to alleviate the suffering of at least one orphan.
We are excited, and I hope others will be too.
Large family life, through a mama's eyes
Showing posts with label Ethiopian adoption. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ethiopian adoption. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Monday, May 31, 2010
A Big Decision
In light of the recent loss of the baby we were ready to adopt, the subject has come up over the last few weeks about whether we should continue on our original adoption plans from Ethiopia.
It is a subject neither Mike nor I take lightly.
We had spent over a year researching Ethiopia. We spent another year gathering paperwork, filing necessary paperwork, connecting with other adoptive parents and following legal trends and formalities. It was decided that I would travel to pick up the children, hopefully with either my older daughter or a good friend when the time came.
We have invested many hours of training, obtained numerous references, signatures, and have felt God's hand and presence through it all. We were distracted when we had the opportunity to adopt a newborn sibling of one of our children, although we felt it was the right thing to do to put off the Ethiopian adoption long enough to finalize the domestic adoption right in front of us.
Then the domestic adoption fell through. Our hearts were broken, our faith was shaken, and we really wondered what the next step would be. Do we quit the path we were trying so faithfully to walk? Did God change His mind? Did we really even understand what it was that we were suppose to do next?
A sweet friend brought me a small glass jar, with beautiful crystals floating in a clear liquid,with a small token which had baby feet imprinted on it. It was to be a memorial jar for our lost baby Ava, the one that had grown in our hearts but we would never be able to raise in our family. It symbolized the tears that we cry that Jesus tells us He collects for us. Someday those tears will be laid at the feet of the One who called us to care for the orphans. This baby will not be forgotten in our hearts.
I was ready to give up trying again. Friends reminded me of the joys we have with the 10 children we have been graciously given through birth and adoption. We are so grateful. The losses along the way are still painful, so desiring children that can only come through the gift of adoption, we know we are opening ourselves up to possibly suffer another loss. In my heart, I don't think I can suffer anymore.
However, this is a partnership in adoption. Mike, although shaken, did not feel as if all hope was gone. He cried,out from his heart, "What do we do if there is a child in Ethiopia who is waiting for us, but we were too bruised or wounded to make that final step to go get them?" He was not ready to give up hope.
I prayed for peace, asked for hope, and this weekend we decided to step out on faith once again and reopen the process that was nearly complete several months ago. The time is right to begin again, and we will step faithfully over the next few weeks as we tie up lose ends that will allow us to continue the Ethiopian adoption.
As a family, we know God has called us to be faithful to meet the needs of others. We believe we are honoring Him by loving the "least" of these. In our home, we want the focus to be on the little ones that we can love and raise to be a part of an eternal kingdom. It's just what we do.
Thanks to all our family and friends who continue to pray for us. It will not be an easy road, but one that we are happy to be traveling again.
It is a subject neither Mike nor I take lightly.
We had spent over a year researching Ethiopia. We spent another year gathering paperwork, filing necessary paperwork, connecting with other adoptive parents and following legal trends and formalities. It was decided that I would travel to pick up the children, hopefully with either my older daughter or a good friend when the time came.
We have invested many hours of training, obtained numerous references, signatures, and have felt God's hand and presence through it all. We were distracted when we had the opportunity to adopt a newborn sibling of one of our children, although we felt it was the right thing to do to put off the Ethiopian adoption long enough to finalize the domestic adoption right in front of us.
Then the domestic adoption fell through. Our hearts were broken, our faith was shaken, and we really wondered what the next step would be. Do we quit the path we were trying so faithfully to walk? Did God change His mind? Did we really even understand what it was that we were suppose to do next?
A sweet friend brought me a small glass jar, with beautiful crystals floating in a clear liquid,with a small token which had baby feet imprinted on it. It was to be a memorial jar for our lost baby Ava, the one that had grown in our hearts but we would never be able to raise in our family. It symbolized the tears that we cry that Jesus tells us He collects for us. Someday those tears will be laid at the feet of the One who called us to care for the orphans. This baby will not be forgotten in our hearts.
I was ready to give up trying again. Friends reminded me of the joys we have with the 10 children we have been graciously given through birth and adoption. We are so grateful. The losses along the way are still painful, so desiring children that can only come through the gift of adoption, we know we are opening ourselves up to possibly suffer another loss. In my heart, I don't think I can suffer anymore.
However, this is a partnership in adoption. Mike, although shaken, did not feel as if all hope was gone. He cried,out from his heart, "What do we do if there is a child in Ethiopia who is waiting for us, but we were too bruised or wounded to make that final step to go get them?" He was not ready to give up hope.
I prayed for peace, asked for hope, and this weekend we decided to step out on faith once again and reopen the process that was nearly complete several months ago. The time is right to begin again, and we will step faithfully over the next few weeks as we tie up lose ends that will allow us to continue the Ethiopian adoption.
As a family, we know God has called us to be faithful to meet the needs of others. We believe we are honoring Him by loving the "least" of these. In our home, we want the focus to be on the little ones that we can love and raise to be a part of an eternal kingdom. It's just what we do.
Thanks to all our family and friends who continue to pray for us. It will not be an easy road, but one that we are happy to be traveling again.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Waiting
I think we are all getting anxious for the Ethiopian adoptions to proceed. It feels like we have been waiting for this "pregnancy" to end much too long!!
Bella has a comment to make nearly every day about the "new babies." She sees the cribs set up, blankets folded neatly, waiting to wrap up our treasures. She sees bottles and pacifiers in the store, and begs me to purchase them so that we can get them home "for our babies." She plays with her dolls, calling them "Africa" or "Opia." She asks to see pictures of our babies on the computer. Every baby in the stores, in her mind, is fair game and she doesn't understand why we can't take them home.
I hear you, Bella. I feel the same urgency!!
We got news late last week that our placing agency in Oregon finally received a first draft of our homestudy. Our social worker suggested some changes and sent it back to the homestudy agency in Michigan. I hope that means we could expect to receive a finished report some time this coming week. I can not express how frustrating this whole process has been the entire 2009 year. But now it seems as if we are nearing the close to that chapter, which allows us to move on, finally, to the next stage.
We knew when we started the process that International Adoption would not be easy. We knew it could be frustrating, time consuming, and a ton of paperwork. We have done our part, completing hours of training, determined to see this through to the children God has waiting for us across the world. I read stories of families who have been on this adoption path for years, waiting for government approvals, or to get to the top of waiting lists, and I wonder how they keep their spirits up. It is hard to wait. And wait. And wait. So far we are just waiting on paperwork. So out of our control.
Life continues. I pray daily for ways to make a difference in lives around me. In my home, in my family, in my neighborhood, in my church. I know somewhere in Ethiopia is a family in distress, making difficult decisions for their children. Perhaps they are struggling with life threatening illness, and they hope for a safe place for their children to grow and thrive. Maybe they have already taken their last breath, and children have been shuffled to an orphanage that is overwhelmed with the needs of the many others in the same situation. I don't know what our childrens story will be. But I know there is a story forming now, that will impact the lives of our future children, and our lives as well.
I am trusting our God to protect the children who may be waiting for us, and I am hoping He finds me faithful to complete the things I need to do here in the meantime.
2010 is a new year. I hope this year we can bring our children home.
Bella has a comment to make nearly every day about the "new babies." She sees the cribs set up, blankets folded neatly, waiting to wrap up our treasures. She sees bottles and pacifiers in the store, and begs me to purchase them so that we can get them home "for our babies." She plays with her dolls, calling them "Africa" or "Opia." She asks to see pictures of our babies on the computer. Every baby in the stores, in her mind, is fair game and she doesn't understand why we can't take them home.
I hear you, Bella. I feel the same urgency!!
We got news late last week that our placing agency in Oregon finally received a first draft of our homestudy. Our social worker suggested some changes and sent it back to the homestudy agency in Michigan. I hope that means we could expect to receive a finished report some time this coming week. I can not express how frustrating this whole process has been the entire 2009 year. But now it seems as if we are nearing the close to that chapter, which allows us to move on, finally, to the next stage.
We knew when we started the process that International Adoption would not be easy. We knew it could be frustrating, time consuming, and a ton of paperwork. We have done our part, completing hours of training, determined to see this through to the children God has waiting for us across the world. I read stories of families who have been on this adoption path for years, waiting for government approvals, or to get to the top of waiting lists, and I wonder how they keep their spirits up. It is hard to wait. And wait. And wait. So far we are just waiting on paperwork. So out of our control.
Life continues. I pray daily for ways to make a difference in lives around me. In my home, in my family, in my neighborhood, in my church. I know somewhere in Ethiopia is a family in distress, making difficult decisions for their children. Perhaps they are struggling with life threatening illness, and they hope for a safe place for their children to grow and thrive. Maybe they have already taken their last breath, and children have been shuffled to an orphanage that is overwhelmed with the needs of the many others in the same situation. I don't know what our childrens story will be. But I know there is a story forming now, that will impact the lives of our future children, and our lives as well.
I am trusting our God to protect the children who may be waiting for us, and I am hoping He finds me faithful to complete the things I need to do here in the meantime.
2010 is a new year. I hope this year we can bring our children home.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Afriopia
A sweet time in the evenings in our family is when the youngest 4 sit with me around my laptop and view pictures of children in Ethiopia. We are learning about their culture and Mere will often point to a child and say, "Aww, is that one our baby?"
She is also quick to notice children of color in our local market and will often pull on my shirt and whisper, "Is that one ours?" It's all such a mystery that even the little ones are excited to move forward and get introduced to who our next baby will be.
So, I trudge on. I printed the formal application to our new homestudy this week. The frustration mounts in my chest as I survey the whole process beginning again, and I try to reason myself out of the tedious, but needful, paperwork.
After all, we have another grandchild on the way. We are planning a vacation to the east coast to visit our two grandsons in July, and hope to go back in October for the new baby.
And our oldest daughter is getting married in August. Busy time for our family to make new memories.
And my parents are facing a tough decision with my youngest brother who will need to be transitioned into a new living facility that can meet his mental, social and emotional needs. They need our support right now, and they are not getting any younger.
My brother just had a heart attack and 4 bypasses. I have nieces having babies, other nieces going on mission trips, and cousins getting married. I have a son that is going to hit his first teen year in October, and he's already needing more attention and alot of help if he's going to be successful in Junior high in the fall.
Plus, I have a daughter who's 11 going on 16, not to mention the younger 5 sibs that keep us on our toes.
So, who needs Ethiopia??? Why are we driven to follow our heart there??
As the evening sun sets and little hands began rubbing sleepy eyes, the littlest ones gather around and want to snuggle as we look at pictures of children that resemble the ones implanted in our hearts many months ago. The children that God impressed us with who are waiting for us so many miles away.
Because of Mere, who tells anyone who will listen that we have a new baby brother or sister waiting for us in AFRIOPIA - and as it warms my heart, it also gives me the next push to grab that pen, finish the paperwork and send it off to the ones who are responsible to get us going in the right direction.
God implanted the desire in our hearts, and the little hands and eyes around us remind us that someone is missing from our clan, and soon, very soon, all the setbacks will be over and we will be with the child who is meant to be a part of our family forever.
Keep searching, Mere. Afriopia, as she says, is not so very far away if you can believe in the plan God gave us with the simple faith of a child.
She is also quick to notice children of color in our local market and will often pull on my shirt and whisper, "Is that one ours?" It's all such a mystery that even the little ones are excited to move forward and get introduced to who our next baby will be.
So, I trudge on. I printed the formal application to our new homestudy this week. The frustration mounts in my chest as I survey the whole process beginning again, and I try to reason myself out of the tedious, but needful, paperwork.
After all, we have another grandchild on the way. We are planning a vacation to the east coast to visit our two grandsons in July, and hope to go back in October for the new baby.
And our oldest daughter is getting married in August. Busy time for our family to make new memories.
And my parents are facing a tough decision with my youngest brother who will need to be transitioned into a new living facility that can meet his mental, social and emotional needs. They need our support right now, and they are not getting any younger.
My brother just had a heart attack and 4 bypasses. I have nieces having babies, other nieces going on mission trips, and cousins getting married. I have a son that is going to hit his first teen year in October, and he's already needing more attention and alot of help if he's going to be successful in Junior high in the fall.
Plus, I have a daughter who's 11 going on 16, not to mention the younger 5 sibs that keep us on our toes.
So, who needs Ethiopia??? Why are we driven to follow our heart there??
As the evening sun sets and little hands began rubbing sleepy eyes, the littlest ones gather around and want to snuggle as we look at pictures of children that resemble the ones implanted in our hearts many months ago. The children that God impressed us with who are waiting for us so many miles away.
Because of Mere, who tells anyone who will listen that we have a new baby brother or sister waiting for us in AFRIOPIA - and as it warms my heart, it also gives me the next push to grab that pen, finish the paperwork and send it off to the ones who are responsible to get us going in the right direction.
God implanted the desire in our hearts, and the little hands and eyes around us remind us that someone is missing from our clan, and soon, very soon, all the setbacks will be over and we will be with the child who is meant to be a part of our family forever.
Keep searching, Mere. Afriopia, as she says, is not so very far away if you can believe in the plan God gave us with the simple faith of a child.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Horrible Homestudy Nightmare
Well, we did it. We actually found a new agency to conduct our International Homestudy.
Yes, we thought we were past this point too. Like, six months ago. We kept contacting our agency and we finally got a letter from them on Friday that said, "____(insert social worker name here) is no longer with our agency."
They returned our money, and said there was no one else in our area, so SEE YA!! I was in disbelief at first, then tears, then panic set in. Six months and intensive paperwork, and it's all over???
I immediately got ahold of our placement agency, for direction mostly, and let off alot of steam. My chest hurt, and I knew it was from holding my breath. I can not believe God had lead us this far toward our Ethiopian child, just to be at a serious stopping point now. What to do?
A new plan formed. I was going back a half of year to start at the research phase - again. Would we ever get past this dreaded point?? How could we have sailed through our 7 domestic adoptions, just to be disappointed that we couldn't seem to obtain that important piece of this international puzzle? My second oldest daughter spoke words of wisdom all the way from Oregon. "Mom, maybe this is the part where you concede and stop trying for another child."
Ah, the joys of adoption. Plans change, obstacles need overcoming, attitudes have to be checked again and again, and here we are at a crossroad. Which way to go now?
Then, a kind voice at the end of the other line speaks comfort to me. Finally. Yes, they can do our homestudy. No, we are not too old to adopt from Ethiopia. Yes, adding another child is perfectly understandable. No, for some families, 10 children is NOT enough. Whew. Has God lead us here? Yep. Is HIS hand still guiding our steps? Sure is!! Is HIS will still our focus? Definately!!
So I began the process (again) of filling out homestudy paperwork. Since I have been here before, maybe it won't seem so daunting this time...
Maybe.
At least there is hope again. And hope is waiting for us in Ethiopia!!
Yes, we thought we were past this point too. Like, six months ago. We kept contacting our agency and we finally got a letter from them on Friday that said, "____(insert social worker name here) is no longer with our agency."
They returned our money, and said there was no one else in our area, so SEE YA!! I was in disbelief at first, then tears, then panic set in. Six months and intensive paperwork, and it's all over???
I immediately got ahold of our placement agency, for direction mostly, and let off alot of steam. My chest hurt, and I knew it was from holding my breath. I can not believe God had lead us this far toward our Ethiopian child, just to be at a serious stopping point now. What to do?
A new plan formed. I was going back a half of year to start at the research phase - again. Would we ever get past this dreaded point?? How could we have sailed through our 7 domestic adoptions, just to be disappointed that we couldn't seem to obtain that important piece of this international puzzle? My second oldest daughter spoke words of wisdom all the way from Oregon. "Mom, maybe this is the part where you concede and stop trying for another child."
Ah, the joys of adoption. Plans change, obstacles need overcoming, attitudes have to be checked again and again, and here we are at a crossroad. Which way to go now?
Then, a kind voice at the end of the other line speaks comfort to me. Finally. Yes, they can do our homestudy. No, we are not too old to adopt from Ethiopia. Yes, adding another child is perfectly understandable. No, for some families, 10 children is NOT enough. Whew. Has God lead us here? Yep. Is HIS hand still guiding our steps? Sure is!! Is HIS will still our focus? Definately!!
So I began the process (again) of filling out homestudy paperwork. Since I have been here before, maybe it won't seem so daunting this time...
Maybe.
At least there is hope again. And hope is waiting for us in Ethiopia!!
Friday, March 13, 2009
The Dossier
Today we recieved our email dossier packet. It is a full 26 pages of forms for filling out, signing, authenticating with the State and sending to our agency. MORE paperwork in the path of our international adoption!!
It's an exciting week. After sending our application and contract to the agency we chose, getting the "infamous" dossier is a milestone. Our homestudy paperwork is almost complete, and we will send all that out after we get our physicals and doctors paperwork. Then we will be able to do our 12 hour training and have the social worker come visit. After 7 domestic adoptions, none of that is daunting.
But, then I read through the dossier. This appears to be the paperwork that separates the weak hearted from the determined!! So may forms, so much information, and soooo much to do!!But this is the next step to building the "walls" of our home, and the middle part of the international adoption plan.
With all that, I am excited to be at this phase. I know the next several weeks will be stressful and confusing, but I will stay the course. At the end will be the blessing of a child, or children that are waiting for us now.
So, dossier, here we come. Baby Cameron, dear child of our heart, we are working hard to bring you home. Nothing will stop us from the plan that God has placed in our hearts. Stay safe. Sweet dreams.
It's an exciting week. After sending our application and contract to the agency we chose, getting the "infamous" dossier is a milestone. Our homestudy paperwork is almost complete, and we will send all that out after we get our physicals and doctors paperwork. Then we will be able to do our 12 hour training and have the social worker come visit. After 7 domestic adoptions, none of that is daunting.
But, then I read through the dossier. This appears to be the paperwork that separates the weak hearted from the determined!! So may forms, so much information, and soooo much to do!!But this is the next step to building the "walls" of our home, and the middle part of the international adoption plan.
With all that, I am excited to be at this phase. I know the next several weeks will be stressful and confusing, but I will stay the course. At the end will be the blessing of a child, or children that are waiting for us now.
So, dossier, here we come. Baby Cameron, dear child of our heart, we are working hard to bring you home. Nothing will stop us from the plan that God has placed in our hearts. Stay safe. Sweet dreams.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Adoption Paperwork
When my adopted kids ask me "Where do babies come from?", for the last 7 years we havetold them "Babies come from the agency." That was: 'as in foster agency.'
Now we are on our official track for an International Adoption so we can say, with excitement, Ethiopia!!
We view pictures, read blogs from other Ethiopian Adoption families, and we listen to music from their country. We admire their beautiful skin, dark eyes, and gentle smiles. Our youngest children scan each picture, asking, "Is that our baby?", or, "Will that little one come to live with us?"
I lay in bed at night wondering what type of child the Ethiopian government will refer to us. Will it be a baby girl, a toddler, an older child? Will she speak any of our language, or will he be shy or outgoing? Will he want my hugs and kisses, or will it take alot of time to break through the barrier of his painful past?
The paperwork is intense. It examines every thought I have ever had on adoption, and challenges every answer I write down. I feel my heart wrapping around this unknown-to-me child, and I wonder how long the wait will be. I am impatient to finish the process, as impatient as I was to finally begin it!! I recognize the opportunity, and I sense the deep responsibility. I know I can love this child without reserve, and I hope that she will be able to love us the same way, some day.
We are ready for the first notarized copy to be mailed off tomorrow. As I collect important papers for copying, filing forms and creating our complete history, I understand the importance of what is ahead. I know there will be trials, painful waiting periods, and even disappointments. I realize there is nothing I can do to speed up the whole process, but I faithfully fill out form upon form in the hopes that the sooner I get this part done, the closer we will be to meeting the child or children God has waiting for us in a country far away from here.
Waiting. This is the pregnancy of adoption. This is the long haul before the realization of our prayers and desires. This is the growing stage, the morning sickness stage, the tired-before-I-really-get-worn-out phase. Waiting.
As I connect with others in the adoption process, I share in the joy of their referrals and court dates. I am amazed even more every day of how God brings the homeless into warm and loving homes, even from so very far away. My mind and heart are stirred into action, and I finish the final draft of what seems to be taking us forever to finish!! But mostly, I wonder about the child who is patiently waiting for us. And I smile inside as I realize we are another step closer to bringing him or her home. Soon, baby. Soon. Don't give up waiting for us. We will keep waiting for you until God has our hands entwined, just as our hearts have become as we wait for you.
Now we are on our official track for an International Adoption so we can say, with excitement, Ethiopia!!
We view pictures, read blogs from other Ethiopian Adoption families, and we listen to music from their country. We admire their beautiful skin, dark eyes, and gentle smiles. Our youngest children scan each picture, asking, "Is that our baby?", or, "Will that little one come to live with us?"
I lay in bed at night wondering what type of child the Ethiopian government will refer to us. Will it be a baby girl, a toddler, an older child? Will she speak any of our language, or will he be shy or outgoing? Will he want my hugs and kisses, or will it take alot of time to break through the barrier of his painful past?
The paperwork is intense. It examines every thought I have ever had on adoption, and challenges every answer I write down. I feel my heart wrapping around this unknown-to-me child, and I wonder how long the wait will be. I am impatient to finish the process, as impatient as I was to finally begin it!! I recognize the opportunity, and I sense the deep responsibility. I know I can love this child without reserve, and I hope that she will be able to love us the same way, some day.
We are ready for the first notarized copy to be mailed off tomorrow. As I collect important papers for copying, filing forms and creating our complete history, I understand the importance of what is ahead. I know there will be trials, painful waiting periods, and even disappointments. I realize there is nothing I can do to speed up the whole process, but I faithfully fill out form upon form in the hopes that the sooner I get this part done, the closer we will be to meeting the child or children God has waiting for us in a country far away from here.
Waiting. This is the pregnancy of adoption. This is the long haul before the realization of our prayers and desires. This is the growing stage, the morning sickness stage, the tired-before-I-really-get-worn-out phase. Waiting.
As I connect with others in the adoption process, I share in the joy of their referrals and court dates. I am amazed even more every day of how God brings the homeless into warm and loving homes, even from so very far away. My mind and heart are stirred into action, and I finish the final draft of what seems to be taking us forever to finish!! But mostly, I wonder about the child who is patiently waiting for us. And I smile inside as I realize we are another step closer to bringing him or her home. Soon, baby. Soon. Don't give up waiting for us. We will keep waiting for you until God has our hands entwined, just as our hearts have become as we wait for you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)